glow notes

Tuesday, July 19, 2005


"If you're not playing a big enough game, you'll screw up the game you're playing just to give yourself something to do." Anonymous.

What a great quote. I think a lot about goals. A friend of mine doesn't like the concept, finds it too "rah rah." I don't have quite that feeling, but I do have the sense that sometimes we hide behind a goal that isn't, in fact, what we want to achieve.

Women (and some men), for instance, sometimes just "want to lose that last 5 pounds." What happens when they do lose that five pounds? Bliss? Eternal salvation? What? WHAT? I mean, 5 pounds is frankly nothing in real terms. Calculate your necessary caloric intake based on basal metabolism and activity, cut 250-500 calories per day, and lose 1/2 to 1 pound per week. In 5-10 weeks you're there, no big. (Sidenote: I don't mean to imply that it's always that simple -people do have physical problems that impede weight loss, but in a majority of instances, it's something in our thinking that gets in the way).

So now what? You've lost the 5 pounds.

You ready to run for president?
Quit your job and open a fingernail salon?
Start a foundation for pit bulls in need of rescue?
Meet your dream lover?
Travel to the jungles of South America and study rare beetles?
Write that best-selling spy novel?

Wait! SCARY!

We want our dreams so bad, but it's frightening to take the steps necessary to get there. Believe me, I know.

So . . . we get to keep losing that same 5 pounds over and over because it gives your Self something to do while deferring the real dream.

I'm focusing on weight loss, but other small goals (pseudo-goals) can be the same.

I don't have a solution for this, necessarily. But perhaps if I recognize this phenomenon, I can keep it from popping up so much in my life. I know what my dreams are, that's huge. I can take a turtle step a day, that's even huger. And, if it gets scary, guess what?

That's ok.

I can do scary. I can be kind with myself. I can slow down. I can ask for help. I can take spa days and scrub myself with sugar-infused almond oil.

And guess what happens?

It's really not that scary.


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